d12
1. Divulges personal information of caster
2. Rattles off locations of unguarded treasure
3. Solves math problems with 100% accuracy
4. Topical stand up comedy routine
5. Sings lullaby ad nauseum
6. Repeatedly attempts to place dinner order
7. Warns of nearby traps
8. Dispenses monster-fighting advice straight from the MM
9. Spews incomprehensible gibberish in hysterical tone
10. Babbles a stream of cutsie-pie baby talk
11. Dictates contents of caster's spell book in repeating loop
12. Begins counting down from 100 in voice of 1950's sci-fi robot
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