OPERATION UNFATHOMABLE

Monday, February 10, 2014

The Evil Sorcerer's Alter Ego

d12
1. As half-naked torchbearer, spell components secreted in loin cloth, reveals true nature w/pyrotechnic effects, peals of wicked laughter only when object of desire located by adventurers
2. In disguise as visiting high official of respectable local cult sent by home office to catalogue and facilitate return of cult treasures to far off temple for study
3. Never quit day job as Imperial Librarian, accumulates personal library of forbidden texts back at home, replaces originals with fakes full of disinformation cranked out by small army of imp-scribes
4. Pretends to be Evil Deity, frequently descends from the heavens, cloaked by cascading polymorph spells to inspire awe, bewilderment, issues very specific and ever-changing sacrificial requirements always accompanied by half-cogent philosophical screed, cult still modest but growing steadily
5. Lowly thief looking to join the adventuring parties, simulates thiefly responsibilities w/carefully chosen spells, mutters incantations in "thieves' cant", charms the beefiest warrior as personal meat shield, makes off w/choicest treasures
6. Faux-lich: excellent team of makeup artists, maintains lair in prominent dungeon, plays factions off one another, fakes lengthy periods of entombment to attend to surface-world business
7. Assumes likeness of thought-lost heir w/elaborate semi-plausible explanation for disappearance, designs on throne require services of adventurers, multiple seemingly justifiable assassinations
8. As salty old sea-dog spewing continuous stream of ludicrous pirate patois, ostensible captain of trading vessel, offers adventurers passage in exchange for small favor to be followed by ruthless abandonment-at-sea
9. Idle inheritor of vast fortune: famously obsessed collector of rare antiquities, always on the look out for acquisitions specialists, offers generous finder's fee, ensorcels, imprisons successful agents for scientific experiment
10. Soaks down glitterati for all they're worth in guise of health food guru/anti-aging specialist, utterly genuine in fanatical pursuit of the latest and greatest vitality-enhancing regimens
11. Poses as hyper-competent freelance spy/assassin for regional political powers willing to spend outrageous sums to secure services, feeds them half-truths designed to create perpetual tumult
12. Enjoys frequent mind-exchange to body of dashing, refined personal valet, while valet's consciousness puts sorcerer's body through taxing work-out regimen

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