d12
1. Will spare anyone willing to endure a lengthy reading of it's original poetry
2. Worshiped as (evil) deity by pride of sentient lions w/subtly human-like faces
3. Poison from variant scorpion-like tail acts as healing potion when administered in tiny doses, full stinger injection induces "death by healing" as tissues of victim redouble grotesquely until appalling cellular crash
4. Savage fangs, throat-rending claws and everything but eats only cake, swoons if presented one of surpassing quality
5. Looking to extract bribes of gold, jewels, must amass fortune to pay off blood debt to dragon
6. Ravishingly beautiful human face, desperately wants a kiss, if you kiss it w/sincere empathy it will (80%) transmute into original identity of ancient monarch, or (20%) bite your face off
7. Overwhelming instinct to protect children, everyone else can go to hell
8. Lusts for wizard flesh, blood, and spell-laden brains
9. Reads a lot, has awesome library, a master of trivia, spellbinding raconteur, at some point in conversation spine-covered tail lashes out, taking it upon itself to initiate lethal mayhem
10. Recently elected representative of dungeon guardians in wage talks with Dungeon Overlord, anticipates imminent assassination
11. Under blackmail threat by troll who witnessed illicit tryst between manticore and Dungeon Overlord's significant other, now must hunt for insatiable troll mouths as well as own
12. Has waited patiently for uncounted years for arrival of prophesied champion who will ride manticore into battle
Your "Yeah, but this ... " posts are my favourites.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much.
Agreed! The poetry reading, protection of children and the "healing" of its tail are classic! Nice!
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