Friday, July 4, 2014

More Weird Cargo

1. Bathtub-size ceramic bowl w/glass lid obscured by condensation, swamp environment maintained by magic, giant mosquito larvae wriggling hideously within
2. Quasi-lich in coma shipping self to new dungeon lair, travel-sarcophagus protected by lethal glyphs/sigils, tampering triggers magic mouth w/obscenity-laden threats, evil laughter
3. Single giant egg in huge crate, packed for shipping w/luxurious fur-covered pillows
4. Small collection of prototype wizard's robes woven from Kevlar-like fur of armored Pleistocene mammal hidden inside chest of outlandish frocks
5. Cans of gray powder, press for making fist-sized pills, medication to save royal family of evil mountain giants from witch-plague depopulation event
6. Hundreds of aggressive black saplings from Forest of Evil in pots, sacks of enchanted quick-grow fertilizer, smells like Satan's outhouse
7. Alarming number of disassembled siege engines in unmarked crates, designed for use by diminutive soldiery w/tiny hands
8. Locked and chained chests marked by dwarf-runes, order of 250 shock-collars of enslavement
9. Taxidermy of unknown human warriors in ferocious attack poses, each w/real weapons and armor
10. Illegal kraken ink products in several varieties, various bottles, casks: processed for magical inscription, monster repellent, performance-enhancing war drug, intoxicating beverage, cure-all
11. One thousand pounds of salty megalodon-jerky, subterranean dwarfs pay huge money for this stuff
12. Five identical simulacra of regional potentate, heavily sedated

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