Thursday, September 13, 2018

There Are No Dragons in this World



Alternate apex monsters for those occasions when it will be Dungeons & Whatever.

d12
1. Super-powered, hyper-muscular demigods tower over regular humans, world carved into ever-shifting tapestry of fiefdoms each w/demigod patron, driven to amass most fabulous treasures of the world, constant wars of item-specific acquisition
2. Eleven immortal tortoises left over from Dawn Times vary in size from colossal to stupendously huge, each guards single site of ancient power/megadungeon, communicate telepathically w/one another, breath atomic fire but once/century but it's a thermonuclear doozy
3. Giant winged dogs of regal bearing occupy mountaintops, run gamut from benevolent to diabolical, understand human tongues but communicate exclusively in complex language of whines, howls, whimpers, woofs, hoard/bury treasures  according to their own incomprehensible urges
4. Kong-sized royal apes in their heyday, titles of nobility represent full range/relative political power (see Subtable, below), recognize their own system of territories at odds with human political map, build vast walls to hamper human activities
5. Genius giant levitating koi, extended fins billow about majestically, sage-like wisdom sometimes available, more frequently destructive rays emit from toothless maws, bones made of gravity-defying gold
6. Profusion of uniquely inhuman chaos godlings emerge from spawning grounds in the Underworld, employ mind control powers to secure flocks of worshipers, amass wealth, make war upon each other
7. Numerous sea serpents ranging in size from tiny to enormous, intellect develops over slow growth cycle, control all sea trade/warfare, extort vast fortunes in gems from human sea powers for unknown purposes
8. Magic users warp/mutate as they grow in power, eventually becoming insane, terrifying chaos monsters alone in their depopulated towers w/all their unspendable money
9. Perpetually famished segmented swine grow to great serpentine immensity, dwell singly in vast territories due to enormous caloric requirements, despise humankind but obsessed w/human culinary achievements, descend upon farms lands/cities w/indiscriminate gluttony, every part of bodies worth a fortune
10. Giant war-bots left over from prior civilization stand inert like part of the landscape until monkeyed with by sorcery, spell variants abound, none perfect yet, several now accidentally rendered autonomous, fight one another on sight, essentially made out of treasure
11. Godzilla sized race of mantids once ruled the Earth, but got old/sleepy, awaken once in a while to go on killing sprees then mate, numbers remain stable due to murderous nature of coupling, lay single egg atop pile of treasure to be consumed by hatchling, guard jealously for length of gestation: 100 years
12. No creature on earth can hope to match the ferocity of titanic steel-furred earthquake shrews, insatiable appetites keep purple worm population to acceptable minimum, gut loaded with treasures, burrow w/lightning speed, show up unexpectedly, highly articulate, excellent senses of humor, but can only talk for a moment before feeding must commence

Subtable: Sample Royal Apes
Roll d6 for each column, adjust for gender as desired

1. Duke                  1. Klang                    
2. Viscount             2. Grak
3. Prince                 3. Urkk
4. Baron                 4. Chok
5. King                   5. Spang
6. Marquess           6. Chung

20 comments:

  1. I misread 10 as "Giant War-Boots," which would also be awesome, stomping away at people who mess with them.

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  2. I'm thinking it might be fun to have one of each and have them get into fights like the old Toho monsters.

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    ReplyDelete
  15. There are many problems encountered by residents while living in a house which depicts that the house needs immediate care. Suppose the residents of your house are developing allergic reactions which makes our safe space at home a little hard to live. Home is a place where a person comes after a tiring day but what if he is not getting peace at his own place, what should he do then? A professional home inspection in gaithersburg md is always needed in order to make sure that the house where we are living is safe from all the toxins that may affect our health and all other factors that could cause damage to our property which was built with love and a huge amount of our savings. If you suspect something is present in your house causing your family to develop allergic reactions like stuffiness of nose or sneezing, coughing etc, call top to bottom services today and we will make sure to provide you a thorough home mold inspection in gaithersburg md in order to be sure if this is the problem that has been affecting you or there is something more grave present inside your house that needs immediate attention.

    ReplyDelete
  16. When it comes to our homes and their safety, we always want the best. This condition can be applied anywhere and you will not be surprised to see that this is actually the truth. So if we put the inspection of our house in this list, it is obvious that we want quality home inspection in maryland which will ensure that we are free from all the problems by the end of the whole procedure, no matter how many sessions it takes. Usually it's just one inspection but when there is an issue detected which needs more than one day or requires follow up tests, it can take some time hence we should be confident about the person or company we have chosen to proceed further with the whole process. If a person is looking for a home inspection company that will help him get rid of all the problems related to his house, he definitely wants the best. If he searches words like residential home inspector in gaithersburg md and is unable to decide from a number of options, we are here to make it easy for you. At Top to Bottom Services, there are a number of warranties and guarantees that will assure you that we are in safe hands and your investment on your dear house and the trust you have put in us will not go wasted.

    ReplyDelete
  17. It is a common known fact now that radon is a very harmful gas which can get trapped inside our house and then our lungs if inhaled for a longer period of time and it has known to cause lung cancer in non-smokers. In fact, it is the second leading cause of lung cancer after smoking. Due to this reason and as stated by EPA, radon exposure leading to lung cancer takes around 21000 lives annually which is a very alarming figure and this is the reason that without radon testing inspection in Gaithersburg md is incomplete. When a person is looking for a successful home inspection which will make it easy for him to understand what is wrong with his house and what measures should be taken in order to get rid of the problems found, he looks around for a best home inspector to do it for him, he searches words likehome inspectors gaithersburg md in order to find a best options ar at least some good options to choose from, but we have made it easy for you. At Top to Bottom Services, we ensure that you get the best home inspector who will help you throughout the process and will familiarize you with what is happening and deliver maximum satisfaction. You should put 5% of your trust in us and we will gain the 95% back.

    ReplyDelete
  18. As much as home inspections are important,commercial property inspection in maryland also holds a vast importance as offices are considered to be the second place where people spend most of the time in a day. It is very important to get the place inspected thoroughly as EPA reported around 21000 deaths annually due to radon exposure which causes lung cancer in non-smokers. Radon inspection cost in maryland is nothing as compared to the price you will have to pay when prolonged radon exposure will result in causing major health issues. Radon is a colorless odorless gas present in the air all around us in trace amounts but it becomes a hazard when it gets entrapped inside the house and the residents of the house are exposed to it. The safe levels of radon as suggested by EPA is 4pCi/l and the amount more than it is alarming and you need to install a radon mitigation system at your commercial property as soon as possible.

    ReplyDelete
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