Thursday, December 22, 2011

Reports Following Return from Negative Hit Points

1. Meet and greet w/ incarnations of selves past and future
2. Found self waiting in seemingly infinite celestial queue
3. Soundless black pit of oblivion
4. Embodied in form of primitive sub-aqueous jelly
5. Just about to crack the Riddle of Steel
6. Having seen reality for the dream it is, one can never be the same
7. Arrived outside the door to cyclopean mead hall: access denied
8. Almost finished spelling out "Help!" on somebody's Ouija Board
9. Descended esophagus of the Earth Serpent before regurgitated
10. Assailed momentarily by the taunts and jeers of Elysian satyrs
11.  Endured meaningless dialogue w/ mournful spirits in dreary cavern
12. Full tour of the planes of existence: Gygax was right!


  1. Not just sub-aqueous jelly but primitive sub-aqueous jelly? Truly the gods are cruel!

  2. Gah!! Even my sentence fragments are purple! The gods are cruel.

  3. Nice blog. I like all these random tables!

  4. Wasn't the riddle of steel solved when Conan chopped off Thulsa Doom's head?

  5. Mmmmmmmmmmmm... primitive sub-aqueous jelly. It goes great on toast.

    Great blog by the way!

  6. @Jason Carney: I'll have to take your word for it. I'm not that good at science.
    ALL: Thanks for the comments!