Monday, February 6, 2012

Domestics on Duty at the Sorcerer's Tower

1. Trans-dimensional consultant: the ghost of extinct sentient beetle
2. All services performed by host of rejected golem-brides
3. The homonculibrarian
4. Sorcerer's re-animated parents see to daily care and feeding
5. On-staff sycophants rotate shifts to provide 24/7 ego bolstering
6. Pack of highly-trained hench-dogs: total obedience and unconditional love
7. Major Domo: Thoroughly pacified type Q demon in custom butler attire, uses clairvoyance to anticipate needs, teleports to expedite service
8. War Master: retired fighting man under heavy ensorcellment sees to training and deployment of sub-human forces, drunk 75% of waking hours
9. Chief of Treasury shackled to desk and awaiting execution should he not find some way to balance the books
10. Kitchen staff: mind of culinary genius transferred to extremely dexterous body of land kraken
11. Maintenance dept.: disgruntled crew of semi-competent ogres, recently unionized and eager to exercise collective bargaining
12. Scullery shoggoth


  1. Being in the profession herself, "Hhnoculibrarian" is hereby my wife's new nickname. Thank you!

    (And I absolutely love #5. I can just see sniveling toadies jawing at the timeclock at shift-change, catching up on what manner of groveling needs priority.

  2. I swear that was spelled properly when I both typed it and previewed it.


  3. Justin: Thanks for the comments and on words that ridiculous, spelling doesn't count!

  4. The demon in butler attire. Yes. WANT.